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Hunter had his post-op appointment on wednesday. They said we had two options, to either have him admitted to the hospital for a couple of days with an i.v. in him to get him all hydrated, Or they could give him a shot of a steroid that could help with the swelling to go down and at the very least, make him hungry. So he got the steroid shot as well as a shot for pain. This time Bradley got to hold him as I was feeding Gookie at the time. Once those shots kicked in, it was the happiest I had seen him in a week! He DEVOURED a milkshake, cheeseburger and fries and anything else he wanted in the house. He also drank and drank!! YAY! I was worried that he would just crash once the shots wore off. However, he woke up yesterday feeling good and continued to eat and drink!!! He actually did alot yesterday! He didnt have a nap, and he played outside with friends!! A little bit after that i could tell that he wasnt swallowing his saliva again so i gave him his pain meds and he had a great evening and had a great night's sleep!! Oh at the appointment I found out why his whole body writhes after he swallows the medicine. It is alcohol based and has been burning my poor baby!! No wonder he would scratch and pinch me!!! I feel aboslutely horrible that it hurts him soo bad, yet that medicine makes him feel better.

I am interested to see how he will be today. If it was all too much yesterday and today he will just mostly lounge around or what.

I am so glad that he is feeling better! Thanks mom for putting his name in the temple and for all the prayers everyone!

E.R

Hunter was absolutely miserable yesterday. He only nibbled on breakfast (which was more than the day before) and he wouldnt drink anything. He doesnt even swallow his saliva because it hurts. He didnt have a wet diaper at all from the night or at all yesterday. I know I had to take him in. So i load up the kids at 6:30 pm, because brad still wasnt back yet, and we went to the emergency room.
They tried to look in his mouth and he WOULD NOT budge. Poor little guy. They had to wrap him up tight in a sheet, leaving one arm out to take blood and put an i.v. in. They tried twice on each arm and couldnt find his vein because he was sooo dehydrated. It was horrible to have to hold him down, sing in his ear and have him look at me like "what are you doing mom?" Finally they found a vein and gave him some morphine to relax him. And it kicked in. It was the happiest he has been for a couple of days. They gave him an i.v. drip too. I think they would have had us stay longer but he has his dr. appointment today. After he was all hooked up and relaxed Brad came to us in the hospital. He missed all the "excitement".
When we came home Hunter ate potatoes, meatloaf and a couple of bites of roast!!! He hasnt eaten that much since he was in the hospital! SO he was feeling really good thanks to the morphine! We gave him some medicine and he drank and drank! Whew!
I got to sleep in today thanks to Bradley!!! He took care of Hunter this morning who was back to not feeling so hot. But he did drink and eat more than the other mornings. I think my body knows that Brad is home and I have just crashed. I feel so tired and exhausted, as my sister said I have been through the wringer while Brad has been away. I'm just pooped!
My bestest, true blue friend who I have known since senior year of highschool and we were roommates up here is in town. My Magggie. She dropped by really quick last night just to give me a hug!! It was wonderful! We are going to play later this week too.
Brad is home, Hunter has fluids in his body... all is well.

I see the light!

Thank you all for the emails, phone calls and words of encouragement. The worst is over. Yesterday my parents came and stayed the night. It was so nice to have help. Hunter is still very clingy, he really is not feeling well at all. I thought he would be a little better by now but no. Anyway, it was nice that he could cuddle with grammie or papa and i could hold Brooke or whatever. Just not to have to do it all on my own was such a big help. And of course to have the company!!
Bradley comes home tomorrow evening. I miss my best friend! I just can't wait to have him home again!

Hunter Boy

Hunter is burning up right now with a fever. I think he over did it today. With fighting me, clawing at my neck, face and whatever else he could get, when i give him his medicine. Then with throwing a bowl of oatmeal on the floor and it went all over the carpet as well as broke the glass bowl. He tuckered out about 11 this morning so it was time for more medicine and a nap. He must have felt really good when he woke up because as I was folding laundry, he opened the fridge and threw 3 dozen eggs on the floor. SO while i was mopping that up (the kitchen was overdue for a mopping anyway) he went and got into the laundry i had just folded and had fun with that. He wanted OUT so we went to arctic cirlce (this time with cash!) and he played a little bit. Then we had to go home to change his pants, feed Brooke and then off to wal mart so i could get some deodarant! Now we are home and he is just so hot and sooo tired!
This is really sad because he is usually a ball of energy and he is so lathargic! I just gave him some more medicine and the acetaminfin will kick in soon! For now we are snuggling watching milo and otis for the 56th time today! And I still have laundry that was once folded piled in baskets! i just cant tackle that again right now. I too am exhausted and i hate folding laundry so it took alot to finish that task up today, only to have it all over the room. Yes, that is when the tears came today!
I wont be here when my poor husband gets home. Well physically i will, but i am not sure about mentally. I dont mean to complain and whine and be a wimp. But this single mother thing is just not for me.

Terrible, horrible, no good, very bad couple of days!

So all was well until we woke up to Monday. I have a tooth that has absessed and so I woke up and it looked like i had bells palsy, that side of my mouth wouldn't smile and it hurt too. For some reason Gookie was crying alot on this day. After the naps I thought i would take us to arctic cirlce for dinner because they have a great play place for Hunter. Hunter loves to play and be outside but it is very hard to chase after him with Gookie. So the park is hard and going outsidem, it's like he all of a sudden realized the road is right there and is testing his limits there. Too scary to deal with right now. So we go to arctic circle and Hunter runs saying "play..play" and he is so happy. I order something for us to share and my card is denied! So i have to get Hunter to the truck and he is kicking and screaming because he is expecting to play because i said he could. I go to the bank and try the ATM, denied. So i call the bank (at this point both kids are crying) and our card was turned off because we were over drawn too long. Now i only include this embarassing part because I know many of you know this horrible, embarassing feeling. You know how it is to struggle, do your best and well, money sucks. So after this i drive home with sad kiddos. I run out to the mailbox and receive an invitation to go to cousins first b-day party that had started a half hour before and in Shelley. We would all love the company but alas, both cars have empty tanks and well my card doesnt work, the bank is closed so we cant go. I try making dinner and Gookie is just screaming, she wont eat she is just too tired. Soon I join the kids with tears of my own because I know Brad isnt coming home to help me out. FINALLY 9 pm comes and both kids go to bed. I planned on cleaning and folding laundry but I am so exhausted i just veg on the couch. Crap, crap, crappy day.

Tuesday I wake up and i am in so much pain from my !@#&*! mouth I call Brad just crying (poor man, i dont know what i expected him to do!) My wonderful Mother in law comes to my rescue and i go to the dentist. I have to get a root canal $$$$$. They give me a shot and the worst part of the whole ordeal is that he (if you are squeemish dont read) squeezes my absess and it hurts SOOOO BAD!! they leave me to sit and let the numbing begin and this lady comes to talk about our payment options. I am just shaking in pain and on the verge of just crying to her. I mean it hurt! I get all numb and they do the root canal. I get home and poor Gookie was crying for Tammy. She didnt sleep the whole time like i had hoped. I tried pumping a bottle before i left but the suction wasnt happening and the pump wasnt doing anything. Poor Tammy! Of course she is too nice to say that it was that bad, that is never a fun position to be in, to be left with a breastfeeding baby and you cant help them out. THANK YOU MOM! So i feed the kids and load them up in the car and we are off to pick up Brad. It is an hour drive. Brad get;s in the car and we start driving, Brooke does NOT want to be in her seat anymore. She is crying and it is just crappy. Poor Brad was hoping for this warm welcome (we were excited to see him of course) and Brooke is crying and Hunter is acting up etc etc. We finally make it home though and the kids and i are in bed by 10pm. Welcome home Brad, goodnight. Hunter woke up at 3 am crying and then sleeps in between us but horizantally pushing us off the bed.

Wedneday we take Hunter to the hospital for his surgery. We are waiting for them to take him back and we hear the 2 previous tonsil surgery kids just SCREAMING! that get's me scared for what we have to look forward to. Hunter did okay. He was very restless yesterday and pretty much still out of it. I mean he was okay to be in bed all day which would otherwise be impossible. We watched Robin Hood about 30 times, Sword in the stone 12 etc. I am so glad that they kept him over night to monitor everything and i had peace of mind. brad stayed the night with him and Brooke and i came home. This morning he wanted out of that bed! they took out his i.v.'s and Brad got him dressed and seriously he RAN out into the hall ready to go before we were. The worst part is giving him medicine!!! But Brad has been the one to do that. So this evening we take Brad back and as soon as we drop him off Hunter is just crying for his daddy. Truly heartbreaking. Gookie woke up when the car stopped (i had just fed her, i knew she wasnt hungry) and for the first 20 miles i had crying kids and i was cursing Brad's name. Then the sun was setting and the scenery was just beautiful! the beautiful wheat fields and farmhouses, just gorgeous drive. Oh and it really helped that both kids were asleep at this time. We get home and again, both kids are crying and it is time for hunter's medicine and it is the first time i have to do it. He claws at my face and rips out my earring! At this point i am crying along with him. It's just so sad to see your baby like this and well, it hurt too! I put him to bed and he has woken up twice since. The last time was while i was typing this. Time for more lortab. He had this glossy eyed look and was just screaming "NO MAMA NO!!" Breaks my heart to have to wrestle him down, to give him the meds. I know it will take the pain away, he knows it tastes yucky and hurts to swallow. I was crying and begging for him to take it, praying that he would. He spits most of it back up but he got some down and ran to my bed. He is on Brad's side crying for "Daddy". He settled down and i brought him some ice cream mixed with 7-up. I have to keep him hydrated but he is just not drinking. It's just really hard.

I miss Brad and i am so thankful that he came home for this and for all of his help. I am hoping tomorrow will be better. It is hard to be alone for so long anyway, but especially add a tonsil surgery on top of that and it is just miserable. When Hunter is glassy eyed NOTHING makes him happy because well, he's drugged and hurting. At the hospital he pitched a fit because the housekeeping lady took the garbage out! this is what i am dealing with. My poor baby! I think this is the hardest thing i have had to deal with since being a mom, which is nothing compared to what others have dealt with. So i guess i am just a wimp. I am trying to just "deal with it" because what else can i do? AHH! SERENITY NOW!

I Survived

I am very impressed that I got all three of us ready and to church on time! Hunter had a little more energy than he usually does during sacrament meeting but it was just fine. At one point Brooke did need to eat so i just took both kids with me to the mother's lounge. On the way back to the chapel I ran into a friend who took Brooke for me for the last little bit. The funniest part was during the sacrament, and so all is quiet except for Hunter who is laying by my feet. And in a really loud voice he says "hola, Hola, HOLAAAA!" I thought it was really funny so i start laughing and the people infron of me and behind me do too. Afterwards a friend came up to me and said "i didnt know we had spanish speakers in our ward" I told her it was the gift of tongues.

When we got home from church i was exhausted. We all took naps at the same time. Oohdalalee! (sorry, Hunter's new kick is robin hood everyday!)Then Brad called saying we could come up for a visit. Not that kind of visit. He isnt in prison and the kids came too!

So I loaded up the kids in our tiny car because it get's better gas mileage and we drove all the way to Victor Idaho. The most beautiful drive. He is at a beautiful camp/ work ranch. Brad was soo excited to see Hunter. Brooke was asleep at first so he didnt want to disturb her and i am just chopped liver next to Hunter.Although i did get a kiss in there somewhere. I know he misses me, and Iknow that it is hard not to see his kids.

I was able to meet some of the boys they are working with. I guess earlier that day one boy punched another boy out, but that has been the only outburst they have had. I asked one boy what he thought of Idaho, being from inner city Chicago and all. He told me that this was his second year and that he looks forward to coming and that it was very different, but good.
When we got home both kiddos went to bed, and i went to close the curtains and the biggest hobo spider i have EVER seen came out of my window sill! I hate these spiders because they attack and are so poisonous and just ugly. I had just sprayed last week and now i am all paranoid. i wont put Gookie on the floor for a while.

Today we went to the hospital to get things ready for Hunter to have his tonsils taken out on Wednesday. They didnt have him on the schedule so i have to call tomorrow to find out what time that is going to happen.

I think today has been the hardest day yet. I am just tired, i have dishes to do and i am just tired. And i miss my husband. I think this evening we will go to the "wee" so Hunter can play. He wont be in the mood after his tonsils are taken out.

I have this love for wheat fields. I think they are beautiful and I had some wheat themes in our wedding reception. So when we moved into this house and behind our yard was a wheat field, I of course wanted our family pictures taken in the wheat. We first did this when Hunter was like 3 months old. And so of course we had to do it for our family of 4 now. A friend of mine offered to take them in exchange for watching her son and so I of course took her up on the offer. The pictures turned out great and she put a few of them on her blog. And by the way, what we wore was all based on Brooke's dress. The fun having a girl brings! She has this really cute dress and so i just picked our outfits for us to go with hers.

Thanks to my sister and brother in law, Jaime and Dave, the kids and i got out of the house today! We met them in I.F. and we went out to dinner. It was good company and a good time. Thanks Guys, I had fun.

Tomorrow I tackle sacrament meeting on my own, outnumbered two kids to just me. Hunter is actually very good in sacrament meeting, its just being on my own. if anything were to happen i always have Bradley there. What if Brooke has a blow out and needs her diaper changed, or hunter get's hurt and needs to go out etc etc. I am sure it will be just fine, its just my first time on my own in church with just me. After that Hunter goes to nursery anyway and he loves it. I am always excited when i can go to relief society every other week. (our calling is in the library every other week)So i am all anxious to be with friends and fellow moms for relief society, but i havent been able to get my cup filled because i am always in the mother's lounge. However, there was some great company there last week.

I knew i shouldnt have had dr. pepper at dinner. That is why i am still awake! argh. But i do so love the nectar from the Dr. P.